The Only Really Hard Thing About Dying

AUTHOR: Rebecca Ratliff


SPOILERS: Metamorphosis


RATING: PG-13 (language, violence)

SUMMARY: Back in the cellblock after they took Jack away.

CATEGORY: angst, hurt/comfort

ARCHIVE: If I haven't submitted to your site, ask first. I'll say yes, I just like to know where it is.

AUTHOR'S NOTES: this is not really a death fic

DISCLAIMER: All Stargate SG-1 characters are the property of Stargate SG-1 Productions (II) Inc., MGM Worldwide Television Productions Inc., Double Secret Productions, Gekko Film Corp and Showtime Networks Inc. No infringement of those rights is intended. This story is for entertainment purposes only and no money exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. Anybody that you don't recognize is probably mine, so if you borrow them please send me an email to let me know where they are and have them home by midnight. :)

Carter watched O'Neill out of sight, until another wave of pain blinded her. Jonas reached through the bars to take her hand. "Major?"

"Jonas? Are you all right?"

"I'm fine. Don't worry about me, Nirrti's machine didn't work on me."

Carter struggled to sit up against the bars, but she no longer had the strength. Dirty straw crackled under her as she lay back. Something told her it wouldn't be long now. That she would never see Jack again.

Leaving him was the only really hard thing about dying. She wasn't really afraid, no more than of any other unknown, and it wasn't even completely unknown after all they'd been through. She felt Daniel's presence in the cell, closer than ever. With loved ones near on both sides, she was at peace with her fate.

She hadn't stopped being curious about the world around her, even if she was about to leave it. "Why didn't it work?"

He replied lightly, "It seems I'm already pretty close to perfect. Her machine choked on the genetic drift between mainstream humans and my people."

"So how did you get the bruises?"

"Well, you see, hell hath no fury like a Goa'uld scorned. She wanted to give me great power so that I could rule the universe at her side." He affected a melodramatic tone that made her laugh in spite of herself.

"She didn't really say that."

"She did. The slut tried to seduce me, and apparently no one has explained about no meaning no, because when I told her no she knocked me across the room." Guilt came into his voice. "Now I wish I'd played along with her. I could have bought more time for the Colonel."

"Jonas, believe me, it's more of a comfort to him to know that you're OK so far. You two have to be strong for him. Don't let him doubt that you and Teal'c will get out of here. He's going to need to believe that. Besides, I--I haven't got much time left, and I didn't want him to see know. When he comes back and...I'm gone...he's going to need getting you out of here to keep him fighting."

Jonas said, "Major, without you he won't--"

"Yes, Jonas. He will. For you and Teal'c. If you want to remember me, that's how you do it, do you understand me? Take care of him."

She saw tears in Jonas' eyes. "I swear it."

Teal'c said, "I swear it as well, MajorCarter."

She smiled at both of them. "It's been one hell of a ride, hasn't it?"

Teal'c replied, "It has."

"If you get out of here, tell Dad I love him."

Jonas promised, "We will."

"Teal'c...what you've always said about dying free... I understand that. I almost feel like I can fly."

"The skies of your world and every other are yours forever."

Sam Carter closed her eyes and dreamed of flying.


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